1.
Ladies, Gentlemen, Et Cetera, Please Take Partners for a
| WALTZ |
The view from above could either be a stirred pond of drifting flower petals or a box of ticking clockwork. Social waltz sits on the edge between organic and mechanical. Try to feel free, but still united with a partner. Respond to a partner while still fitting with the rest of the room. It feels beautiful to find that balance.
I like social waltz best when it’s about balance,
but the dance has a built-in power gap.
Take another look down, and notice that some of the flower petals or cogs are moving more than others. The ones who move more are the follows, or in traditional terms, the “ladies,” and their partners are the leads, the “gentlemen.” Lots of people don’t pick a role based on gender – I prefer to lead because leads spin less, and I get dizzy easily – and more experienced dancers, myself included, often learn both parts. But it’s nonetheless relevant that the traditionally male part directs every move and is considered the more difficult part, to the point where sometimes a class will be taught by a lead, using a silent junior teacher as a prop to demonstrate moves.
Social waltz has the ghost of the patriarchy inside it.
Unless society is perfectly egalitarian, where everyone both decides what to do and carries out these commands, there will be power disparities.
And when there are power disparities, those with power will be tempted to forget the perspective of those without it.
One evening, I was following a waltz and instead of resting his free hand on top of mine, my lead was squeezing so tightly that I couldn’t pull away.
If we’d been on a collision course with another couple, I would’ve had to put all my trust in this man I’d met two minutes ago when I’d asked him to
dance.
We’ll have a short break between sets. Get a drink, have a snack, keep your energy up.
We’ve got a long night ahead of us.
2.
Ladies, Gentlemen, Et Cetera, Please Take Partners for a
| CROSS-STEP WALTZ |
Recognize and accept that we’re living with a power imbalance.
Come up with ways to make the voices of those with less power heard.
I’ve talked to people who teach beginner waltz who have successfully co-taught classes in lead/follow pairs, each having an equal voice so that each role’s concerns are addressed. One pair even tried to teach all their students to lead and follow at the same time, so they’ll be more flexible and sensitive to their partners’ positions. It’s tough to teach two roles at once, and rather confusing to the students. But maybe with a bit more attention paid to class structure, it could be managed. Or maybe there’s a better way to teach lead/follow empathy.
I would want a classful of beginners who I can test ideas on. Maybe some of them will go on to become as interested in the problem as I am, and test ideas on their own students. Maybe one of us will figure it out, and maybe we’ll be able to make the same principles work in politics, school, the office, or whatever part of society we land in.
3.
Ladies, Gentlemen, Et Cetera, Please Take Partners for a
Char B. Pavlov is a bigender Northern California native in their first year at a small liberal-arts college in the Midwest. When not dancing, they can be found acting in Shakespeare plays, arguing about Star Trek, or reading books about medical malpractice. They are intending a biology major with a history minor